As a result of my feedback session with my teacher, and the qualitative research that I carried out, I have decided to continue drafting my third synopsis, in which the young girl stays at school alone and creates an adventure out of it. The main thing that I was advised to do was to raise the stakes for the protagonist, as they were not as high as what could be to create an interesting short film. Therefore, I have redrafted this synopsis, keeping the first half, and adding an encounter/ experience for the girl towards the end:
Home time at a local Surrey primary school on a bright, winter's day. A young girl bursts out of the doors of her classroom clutching a sheet of paper with her masterpiece on it. Her face drops as her eyes, unfocused, scan the crowd of parent figures. After a short while, she ceases her search and fixes her gaze onto her classroom door. Still holding onto her picture, she heads back inside with reluctance. As she enters the classroom, she immediately drops her things in search for something else to preoccupy herself with. Striding over to the other side of the room, she picks out a box from a cupboard, and pulls out a plethora of fancy dress costumes. Out of the abundance of princess dresses and other colourful outfits, she settles for a woollen jumper, a scarf, and a handbag. Immersed in her own thoughts, she wonders the classroom looking at the walls plastered in childish scrawl, and occasionally stops to admire her own. Still carrying her hand bag, she proceeds on her journey through the school until she ends up at the kitchen. She potters around until she finds something to eat. She continues with her pretend game by pressing buttons and twisting dials. She manages toast, and with pride, she takes her meal and sits in the school's dining room to eat it.
Oblivious to her surroundings, the girl finishes her home made dinner, and leaves the messy plate where it is, neglecting the washing up. Meanwhile, the caretaker of the school begins to lock up the classrooms as the light outside is fading. The girl walks to the end of the hall, and exits through the door at the end. She steps outside on to the cold, hard concrete playground, and heads towards the classroom in which she started her school day, and her journey earlier on in the evening. Still in her grown up persona, she walks with purpose until she spots the caretaker locking the adjacent classroom to the one shes walking into. Frozen in her tracks, she hesitates, and breaks into a run, she forgets her adult character and returns to her child self. Reaching the classroom door as the caretaker is still around the other side, she hesitates once more, and walks inside before being seen. Out of breath, the girl hides from view and listens to the door being locked. With great effort, she removes her costume and tires to a corner of cushions and blankets. She lies onto her bedding, and falls asleep almost instantly.
Home time at a local Surrey primary school on a bright, winter's day. A young girl bursts out of the doors of her classroom clutching a sheet of paper with her masterpiece on it. Her face drops as her eyes, unfocused, scan the crowd of parent figures. After a short while, she ceases her search and fixes her gaze onto her classroom door. Still holding onto her picture, she heads back inside with reluctance. As she enters the classroom, she immediately drops her things in search for something else to preoccupy herself with. Striding over to the other side of the room, she picks out a box from a cupboard, and pulls out a plethora of fancy dress costumes. Out of the abundance of princess dresses and other colourful outfits, she settles for a woollen jumper, a scarf, and a handbag. Immersed in her own thoughts, she wonders the classroom looking at the walls plastered in childish scrawl, and occasionally stops to admire her own. Still carrying her hand bag, she proceeds on her journey through the school until she ends up at the kitchen. She potters around until she finds something to eat. She continues with her pretend game by pressing buttons and twisting dials. She manages toast, and with pride, she takes her meal and sits in the school's dining room to eat it.
Oblivious to her surroundings, the girl finishes her home made dinner, and leaves the messy plate where it is, neglecting the washing up. Meanwhile, the caretaker of the school begins to lock up the classrooms as the light outside is fading. The girl walks to the end of the hall, and exits through the door at the end. She steps outside on to the cold, hard concrete playground, and heads towards the classroom in which she started her school day, and her journey earlier on in the evening. Still in her grown up persona, she walks with purpose until she spots the caretaker locking the adjacent classroom to the one shes walking into. Frozen in her tracks, she hesitates, and breaks into a run, she forgets her adult character and returns to her child self. Reaching the classroom door as the caretaker is still around the other side, she hesitates once more, and walks inside before being seen. Out of breath, the girl hides from view and listens to the door being locked. With great effort, she removes her costume and tires to a corner of cushions and blankets. She lies onto her bedding, and falls asleep almost instantly.
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